My friends and I tend to have really weird conversations. Just last night we got some alcoholic slushies and went to my friend’s apartment and sat around for five hours and just talked about anything and everything. One particular subject was about relationships and marriage.
Personally, I feel that most 21-year-olds are too immature for marriage. There are exceptions, but for the most part, I just can’t imagine being married that young. For me, anyway, I’m just too emotionally immature to be responsible for myself, much less someone else.
And perhaps my personal biases cloud my judgment. Commitment scares the crap out of me and I tend to feel trapped and suffocated whenever I am in a relationship, but fer realz. I don’t think I’m alone in this. Even my friends who are in a relationship blanch at the thought of marriage.
As a Catholic, I’ve heard over and over and over again that dating is meant to determine who you will eventually marry. I even have a friend that says you should be considering marriage after you’ve been dating your significant other after six months. Six. Months. That’s just mind-boggling to me. Most of my relationships barely make it past the month-long mark, but nonetheless — if I ever do make it to six months, I doubt I’ll be thinking of marriage. And I’ve told my parents over and over that if I ever do find anyone that I can tolerate enough to spend the rest of my life with, it’s going to be a long time before I get to the engagement part and it’s going to be a really long engagement. At least a year.
This subject came about, as I said, from a conversation I had with my friends. The conversation also came about as we talked about people (specifically women) who feel pressured to be committed by the time they reach 21. Perhaps the pressure is more with women — and to be honest, I’ve never met a man who freaked out because he wasn’t married yet — but it’s something that no one should rush into. If you feel pressured or desperate to be in a relationship simply because of age, the likelier you are to make huge mistakes you will come to regret later in life. Desperation is usually a sign that you’re not ready for a relationship.
In the end, I blame effing Edward Cullen and all this Twilight BS. But that’s a rant for another day.