Thursday Three: “how much my week has sucked” edition

There’s no way to sugar coat it. My week could not be construed in any way, shape or form as a good week. Most of it has to do with car issues, but let’s not forget about summer school.

Let’s take it from the top.

1. My car needs a new engine

There are times when I regret not going to mechanic school. Because if I did, I’d be bucking gender stereotypes, the jobs are fairly plentiful, the money is sweet, and I’d be able to fix my own car.

I took my car to the shop yesterday because it’s been doing this weird shaking thing lately and sometimes it’ll stop completely when I’m at a stop light. I can’t accelerate or anything — even the brake will lock up. And it’s been burning oil like nobody’s biz.

Well today the mechanic informed me that my car needs a new engine because one of the pistons is completely damaged and it’s burning oil and a bunch of other crap that I can’t remember because my mind was reeling over the fact that I’m going to need a new engine. And that’s going to cost about $4,000, which is almost as much as what I paid for the car.

So my dad laid it out for me plain and simple: going to Rome or my car.

Have I mentioned how much I suck at making adult decisions? Because I do.

2. I got pulled over for the first time ever

Since my car has been acting wonky for a while and since I took it to the shop, I drove my mom’s car to school yesterday. And I got pulled over for the first time.

Let me just take this opportunity to say that I am a very cautious driver. I accelerate slower than a snail. I brake at least five hundred feet before I actually get to the light. And I never speed, unless I’m on the highway on extended road trips. In fact, I was hoping to go at least ten more years without getting pulled over.

It turns out, the cop pulled me over because the inspection sticker on my mother’s car was four months expired. When I called my mom to inform her of this, she said, “No, it’s not! The inspection’s not expired! He pulled you over because you did something wrong!”

“Ma!” I shouted. “I got pulled over because your inspection’s expired!”

Two minutes later when my father called, I got to repeat the same conversation.

“What do you mean the inspection’s expired? How can it be expired?” he demanded.

“I’m looking at it right now, it says March 2011! I don’t understand why you think I’m lying!”

I got off with a warning because it wasn’t my car, but it still didn’t make up for the fact that I got pulled over in the first place, nor did it make up for the fact that my parents seem to think I’m a lying, speeding delinquent.

3. I love it when non-Catholics tell me about Catholicism

Not really.

The other day, my music appreciation instructor gave us the order (in list form) of a Catholic Mass. According to my non-Catholic music appreciation instructor, it goes like this:

  • Intro
  • Kyrie
  • Blessing/”some sort of reading”
  • Gloria
  • Another blessing/”some sort of reading”
  • Offertory
  • Creed
  • Communion
  • Sanctus (Holy Holy Holy)
  • Agnus Dei (Lamb of God)
  • Dismissal
Good to know I’ve been doing it wrong for 22 years. I better tell the Vatican about this.

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