Thursday Three: the Jersey Shore Edition

August 4, 2011

For those who actually have taste and integrity and refuse to watch The Jersey Shore, tonight is the season premiere of season 4. Unfortunately, I am not one of those tasteful and integrity-filled people, so I’m moderately excited for the new season to begin. Thus, I have decided to dedicate this week’s Thursday Three to The Jersey Shore and its strange appeal.

1. The formula for the show’s success is drinking and drama

I realize that’s the formula for pretty much all of MTV’s reality shows (which is why MTV has continually high ratings), but The Jersey Shore employs it in a way unique only to a specific culture.

For example a lot of the drama revolves around several so-called “Jersey” characteristics such as tanning, excessive body-building, fist-pumping and Ed Hardy-wearing douchebaggery. Those who live in the Jersey area understand the culture and ignore the show, but those who don’t find it a fascinating cultural study. At least, that’s why I watch it.

That and it’s entertaining.

2. It perpetuates alarming gender stereotypes

Far be it for me to call myself a feminist, I still find myself offended by several antics of The Jersey Shore cast members. For example, the boys have a system of referring to women. A girl who is DTF (down to fuck) is immediately taken home where she is then…well, you know. A woman who is heavy and ugly is called a grenade. Some women who are really ugly are grenade launchers and if they are not dismantled, they will blow up in your face.

Aside from the obviously insulting connotations of such labels, has Mike “The Situation” looked in a mirror lately? If anyone should be labeled a grenade, it should be him. His only redeeming physical characteristic is his body and even then his abs freak me the hell out.

And the double standards…Mike actually called Angelina a slut/whore when she slept with a grand total of two people while they were in Miami when Lord knows how many women he slept with. I know it’s an old stereotype, but it’s one that really doesn’t need to continue.

3. They’re a perfect example of why someone should go to college

The cast members glorify a life of drinking, partying, and random sexing with strangers every night of the week. Unfortunately during the day, they have to work at a T-shirt shop (in Jersey) or a gelato shop (in Miami) in order to pay for their housing and their partying habits.

We do that in college, too. Except we don’t have to work a job. So obviously, if someone wants to live that lifestyle, just go to college and do it without having to work.

That and get an ejukayshun and stuf.